You are getting a posting that no one else has, because no one reads this site and happily that affords me the opportunity to complain ad nauseum.
Today would have been my 26th anniversary. No one cares but me. It fascinates me how quickly a date is removed from the calendars and memory banks of those you think you hold dear. It’s been only three years since Adam died, but no one in my family remembered us today.
Regardless, they did remember to pepper me with questions about when I’d be home from the beach and therefore what I’d be able to do for them. What is my opinion about X, and should we do Y or Z.
I’m just sort of continually amazed at the degree to which I am expected to render an opinion on every little thing. My brain and my heart are exhausted. It would really mean a lot to me if someone would take care of *me* for just a little bit instead of me having to take care of everyone else when I am still so depleted.
I am sorry that I am depleted. I would prefer not to be in this situation. I lost my husband and the underpinning of my life. If it is lame to have not recovered from that yet, well, I am sorry that you don’t understand. But I need for you to spend some time figuring it out for yourself because I am exhausted. Ex. Haus. Ted. Help.
Anne Lamott says the prayer is Help. Thanks. Wow. I’m saying Help. Help.